Sunday, April 3, 2011

Who's In Control? (commentary)

Who's In Control?
by John Trent

“He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still” ~Lao Tzu

Many of us walk around feeling as if we have a reasonable level of control over our everyday lives. We take our children to sports practice and attend functions on ‘our schedules’; thus giving us a sense of satisfaction and normalcy.

What I would like to suggest, perhaps, is that, we, so called normal folk, are not in control of our daily lives as we might think. This is not an observation, a theory or an opinion. This is a statement of scientific fact based on several scientific studies dating back to 1936. These long-term studies have proven we are not in control of ourselves rather we are controlled by our subconscious mind; thus, making most of our thoughts spontaneous and automatic with no real control being exerted in everyday life.

Let’s think about an example or two of the above. Someone pulls out in front of you in traffic, someone you've never met and you automatically get agitated, annoyed, even stressed. Or, your husband or wife squeezes the toothpaste from the middle and you automatically get frustrated. What causes these reactions?

As normal people, we spend our lives reacting. The reactions just happen, often making matters worse rather than better. Unfortunately, what we see and learn as children become habitual and completely automatic as we grow into adults. In essence, we become robots programmed by those who loved and nurtured us when we were young and impressionable.

We need to regain control. If we do regain control, something extraordinary happens. We start doing the right things and our lives become significantly less stressful. In addition, we start creating a different set of behaviors, which creates a chain reaction with those who are close and those children for whom we nurture and teach. We create a different experience…….a different life.

We need to master our emotions by learning how to ‘stop’. We need to ‘STOP’ and make certain we are behaving in the best possible way. We need to learn how to ‘Yield'. Yielding, allows us to slow down and relearn how to pay attention; thus, becoming the master of each and every moment we live.

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